Feeling the Love.

Sometimes you just can’t listen to what everyone keeps telling you. sometimes you just have to make your own decisions.

I try not to listen to other peoples opinions of people, places or things. I like to experience things and form my own opinion. But sometimes it is hard not to let other peoples opinions dictate my own.

Some people voice their opinions as a way to guild you in the right direction, while others do it to have sway over your decision. Usually it is for their own personal gain or some other malicious intent.

Unfortunately I spent most of my live trying to keep other people happy. Giving more of myself to people than I truly should have. compromising my integrity and happiness.

I don’t want to live that way anymore, I won’t. I will live my life for myself. I will put myself and my happiness first. Some people may consider me selfish or insensitive but all I truly want is to feel whole, true to myself.

Love,

Lady B.

 

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Nightmares.

I tie the nightmares together with little perfect bows, draping them around my mind trying to make it look pretty. My soul a flickering light always waning dangerously close to going out.

The nightmares are a road map through the tangled web that is my phyche. It doesn’t matter how pretty I tie the bows, or how elegantly I drap and place them the nightmares are still haunting.

Always creeping in settling places they don’t belong. My soul once strong and proud, is now jaded and cold. The only thing that makes it feel anymore are the nightmares.

The nightmares are starting to feel like home.

                                       Lady. B

Scares me.

The look in your eyes sent shivers down my spine. You looked deep down into my soul, you saw things no one has ever seen. But you didn’t turn away. My life, my world existed without​ you, but now I don’t see how it can. My mind constantly pulls you into it. Forcing me to acknowledge what i feel; even if it scares me. You are not what I was looking for, because I wasn’t looking for anything. The thought of you not being there petrifies me. I don’t want to think of my life without you in it, that is a loss I am just not willing to take. I don’t know why this is happening it all seems so surreal, but I am excited to see where it takes me.

I want to be with you.